it's been a month.

today i was walking out of yet another ridiculous mass media class and it struck me that 'intro to mass media' is more or less a pop culture philosophy class.

and i hate philosophy classes.

i took one two semesters ago (one? no, two. yeah two.) and hated it. it's so... intangible. there's no right answer, there are just opinions. and that's good! i mean, it's good cause people should have their opinions and that's wonderful, free will, whatnot, but it doesn't make for a very fun class. it's weird cause i come from my RIDICULOUSLY easy math class that has concrete answers (and a shitty teacher) to my mass media class which has absolutely no answers and a decent teacher. and the freshmen/jersey folk/other douche bags just answer classes in the least intelligent way possible and i sit there in my corner and shake my head. occasionally i attempt an answer to a question but the teacher either completely disregards it or it's silently received by the rest of my silent class. it's sad, most times, because the teacher will ask a question and NO ONE will offer a response. NO ONE. so we sit there. finally a shaky hand rises six inches and the person quietly offers up their soon to be devoured and destroyed opinion.

it got me thinking, though, today. inadvertently, perhaps, but still thinking. and i got real bummed. i've been thinking quite a bit about who i am as a person, what my character traits are, my flaws, my strengths, etc. and it hasn't been very fun. and i think about friends of mine and their lives and old friends and the prospect of new friends and all of that. and what do i really want? out of life?

this past month has had some real ups and downs. more than past months. much more.

i'm not afraid of moving out to california. i'm really excited. i can't say if i'll be more afraid when i get closer to the time, but right now, i'm very very excited.

and now i have a headache. workin' overnight at target tonight... not excited. workin' til 6am then i have work at radio shack at 10am... then i'm driving up to Fitchburg, MA to hang out with my fellow uri theatre blokes.

and that's about it.